Understanding Envy and Jealousy...

Understanding Envy and Jealousy...

Are you envious because I am generous? Mt 20:1-16:

            Generosity means that we rejoice in the success and good fortune of others. And what is envy? “Envy,” somebody said, “is a kind of spiritual sickness that restricts the heart so that it cannot rejoice in the good of others, much less, gives to them. Envy is a two-person situation whereas jealousy is a three-person situation. Envy is a reaction to lacking something. Jealousy is a reaction to the threat of losing something (usually someone). Envy occurs when we lack a desired attribute enjoyed by another. Jealousy occurs when something we already possess (usually a special relationship) is threatened by a third person.

            So why the confusion? One problem is an unfortunate sematic ambiguity with the word “jealousy” (but NOT with the word “envy”). If you ask people to describe a situation in which they felt jealous, they are as likely to describe an experience of envy (e.g., "I wished I had my friend's good looks") as of jealousy (e.g., "my girlfriend danced with an attractive guy"). Naturally, this creates a sense that jealousy and envy are very similar—even though they are actually quite different.

God is Jealous

God is also jealous but it’s not exactly the same as human jealousy because God is jealous for the right reasons as we read about in Deuteronomy 4:23-24 “Take care, lest you forget the covenant of the Lord your God, which he made with you, and make a carved image, the form of anything that the Lord your God has forbidden you.  For the Lord your God is a consuming fire, a jealous God.”  The Hebrew word for jealous in this verse is “qanna’” which means “jealous only for God” so God’s jealous is for our own good.  He is jealous when we make an idol that competes or takes the place of where God should be in our lives…that is first and foremost.  Money, family, work, friends, sports, and even Whatsapp or Facebook can become an idol in our lives.  The saying that our hearts are idol factories have been attributed to John Calvin, although I was unable to document this, it’s still true.  The human heart is bent to perpetually forge idols of numerous things and people. God wants us to put Him first and when we do, God promises to provide for all of our needs (Matt 6:33). Jesus said that we should “love the Lord God with all the heart, mind, soul and strength” (Mark 12:30).

            However if you have the predisposition of jealousy or envy, you are not alone.  The human heart is bent toward material things and lusts of the heart.  God is the only one Who can change the human heart (Prov 21:1). 

 

The Sins of the Heart:

H – Hatred

E – Envy

A – Anger

R – Resentment

T – Timidity

Enjoy been what you are....

Enjoy been what you are....

            Fear of social judgment wears many masks: shame, shyness, etiquette, prudence, perfectionism. Whatever form it comes in, its impact is to limit, to constrain, to constrict.

People who fear social judgment miss out on much of life. Across the room they see what could be the person of their dreams, but they don’t approach because of what a roomful of strangers might think if they’re rejected. By caring what these strangers think, they’re allowing people they’ll never see again to control their behaviour.

As I was reading my bible this week, I came across this passage from the Book of Judges; it gives us an opportunity to meditate about living and enjoying ourselves rather than dreaming to live on other's lives and opinions:

            (1 Jgs 9:6-15) "....Once the trees went to anoint a king over themselves. So they said to the olive tree, ‘Reign over us.’ But the olive tree answered them, ‘Must I give up my rich oil, whereby men and gods are honoured, and go to wave over the trees?’ Then the trees said to the fig tree, ‘Come; you reign over us!’ But the fig tree answered them,
‘Must I give up my sweetness and my good fruit, and go to wave over the trees?’ Then the trees said to the vine, ‘Come you, and reign over us.’ But the vine answered them,
‘Must I give up my wine that cheers gods and men, and go to wave over the trees?’ Then all the trees said to the buckthorn, ‘Come; you reign over us!’ But the buckthorn replied to the trees, ‘If you wish to anoint me king over you in good faith,
come and take refuge in my shadow. Otherwise, let fire come from the buckthorn and devour the cedars of Lebanon.’”

            As says my old friend in motivation, Myles Munroe, “When purpose is not known, abuse is inevitable”; know your purpose in life - be the olive tree, the fig and the vine; don't be the buckthorn!

Don't cry for Moses, be Joshua...

Don't cry for Moses, be Joshua...

            Ex. 3: 9 - The Lord said to Moses, "I have indeed heard the cry of my people, and I see how the Egyptians are oppressing them. Now I am sending you to the king of Egypt so that you can lead my people out of his country.” As many of us do, Moses had many excuses before God on why he could not fulfill his calling. Finally he accepted; but it is interesting to note that Moses never set foot in the Promised Land during his lifetime. Moses brought Israel to the borders of Canaan, and then died and left them. This signifies that our 'Moses' mean nothing perfect; they only bring men/women into a wilderness of conviction, but not into the Canaan of rest and settled peace.

            Num. 11: 10-15: Moses, “Lord, why have you brought me this trouble? How have I displeased you that you put the burden of all these people on me? Am I their mother? Did I give birth to them? Are you really asking me to carry them in my arms - as a nurse carries a baby - all the way to the land you promised their ancestors with an oath? Where can I get meat for all these people? They keep crying for me to give them meat to eat. I can’t take care of all these people by myself. This is too much work for me! If this is how you’re going to treat me, why don’t you just kill me? I can’t face this trouble anymore.”

            Dt 31:1-8 - Moses said to them, “I am now one hundred and twenty years old and am no longer able to move about freely; besides, the LORD has told me that I shall not cross this Jordan...It is Joshua who will cross before you, as the LORD promised. Dt 34:1-12 - The LORD said to Moses, “This is the land which I swore to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob that I would give to their descendants. I have let you feast your eyes upon it, but you shall not cross over.” So there, in the land of Moab, Moses, the servant of the LORD, died as the LORD had said; and he was buried in the ravine; Joshua 3:7-11, 13-17 - The Lord said to Joshua, ‘This very day I will begin to make you a great man in the eyes of all Israel, to let them be sure that I am going to be with you even as I was with Moses". The honour to see Canaan was reserved for Joshua, our Lord Jesus, of whom Joshua was a type, (and the name is the same). Be the Joshua, and let Moses remain at the borders! Live Without Excuses and Love without Regret.

 

Giving Gifts: Faith vs. Superstition

Giving Gifts: Faith vs. Superstition
 

       First let's define, "What is a superstition?" A superstition is a belief or notion, not based on reason or knowledge, in or of the ominous significance of a particular thing, circumstance, occurrence, proceeding, or the like. It is the belief in supernatural causality - that one event causes another without any natural process linking the two events—such as astrology, religion, omens, witchcraft, prophecies, etc., that contradicts natural science. It is based on or lack of true knowledge of God and His ways. It is also based on the fear of the unknown.

            On the other hand, faith is based on God. Faith is based on the knowledge of who God is and how and why He does things. Faith is also something that God gives to us and not something that we can generate. We can, at best, respond in faith to what He speaks to us. It is based on trust and confidence in God and His revealed word. We are willing to leave the unknown in the faithful hands of our God who knows and plans our future.   Therefore, superstition, unlike faith, has no substantial basis; nor is its conclusions reached by logical deductions. There are many different superstitions about gift giving. Here are some...

 

“Let my body be turned...!”

“Let my body be turned...!”  - St. Lawrence

            Jesus in today’s gospel (John 12:24-26) presents to us an analogy of living and dying. In dying to oneself especially of our being conceited, self-centered and individualistic, a new life develops. Every human person is like a grain of wheat that falls to the earth and dies. It is in dying that life produces much fruit. Take the example of Jesus.

            The analogy of living and dying is also exemplified by St. Lawrence, the saint we honor today. Saint Lawrence was Chief of the seven deacons of Rome, a Spaniard by birth and was in charge of diocesan properties and charities.

            In the year 258 Pope Sixtus II was led out to die by the Romans. We are told, in the first place, that when the pope was seized, Lawrence accompanied him and asked, with tears in his eyes, “Father, where are you going without your deacon?” The pope answered, “You shall follow me in three days.”

            Inspired by this prophecy, the deacon prepared for death by distributing among the poor all the church funds he had on hand, even adding to that welfare fund by selling some of the sacred vessels. When the prefect of Rome learned of this distribution, he concluded that the Christians were very wealthy. So he summoned Lawrence and ordered him to turn over the church’s treasures, to be added to the fund supporting the Roman army. Lawrence asked only for a few days (three days) to make an “inventory” of church possessions before he presented them. When three days were up, the deacon returned to the prefect accompanied by a large crowd of his poor: the blind, the orphaned, the aged, the lepers, the crippled, the widows and the maidens. “These,” he said to the prefect “are the treasures of the church." The prefect was furious with Lawrence’s answer. At once he arrested him and condemned him to death by roasting alive on a grill (gridiron).

            The story goes on to say that the deacon did not hesitate at one point in his torture to tell his executioners, “Let my body be turned; one side is broiled enough!” what a saint! His death and example led the conversion of Rome that signaled the end of paganism in the city. For us there is no need that we have to follow literally what St. Lawrence did, died a martyr’s death. Each one of us has the capacity to do good and to show kindness to one another. Our acts of kindness might be insignificant but at least we have contributed in making our world a better place to live in.

 

"Me and my Big Mouth!"

19th Ordinary Sunday - Yr B.

Complain and Remain...Praise and be Raised!

            It seems such natural that we are people who love to complain. We are a people who love to murmur. This Sunday's gospel starts by saying that as soon as the Lord said to the Jews: “I am the Bread that came down from heaven,” the Jews murmured to one another. They started to say: “Is this not Jesus, the son of Joseph? Do we not know his father and mother? Then how can he say, ‘I have come down from heaven?" What a difference our attitude towards life makes to our enjoyment of life. This is the positive approach of one woman I knew: "Lord, thank you for this sink of dirty dishes, we have plenty of food to eat. Thank you for this pile of dirty laundry, we have plenty of nice clothes to wear." Such a beautiful positive attitude is what you would expect of a disciple of Jesus. This is not the attitude we see in the Jews who were complaining about Jesus in the Gospel today (John 6:41).

            He said to them, “Stop complaining to each other.” (John 6:43) Why were they complaining? If they had known Jesus properly they would not have complained. We would all do well to pay heed to these words of Jesus, “Stop complaining to each other” because sometimes we complain like the Jews of his time. You have the power to be happy and stop complaining. It is a question of attitude. Be grateful for what you have. See the presence of God with you. Count your blessings. The attitude in the first verse of our Psalm today is an example to us. “I will bless the Lord at all times, His praise always on my lips” (Ps 34:1) Jesus is the bread of life to strengthen us to overcome all our problems. I strongly recommend reading a book called "Me and my Big Mouth!" by Joyce Meyer.  The title of chapter 6 is Complain and Remain, Praise and Be Raised. 

DON'T fear...DON'T lose the focus...

DON'T fear...DON'T lose the focus...
      Fear cripples us. In the gospel the disciples are terrified of the storm even if they are seasoned fishermen. They are more terrified when they see a ghost! The worse of all they even consider Jesus, a ghost. Mt. 14, v. 25: “During the fourth watch of the night, he came toward them, walking on the sea.”
      But when Jesus tells them that it is He, Peter wants to walk on the water with Jesus. He is already taking a few steps when suddenly he notices that he starts to sink. He starts to sink because when instead of focusing himself to Jesus, he focuses on the wind. He starts to sink when his attention is not on Jesus but on the strong wind. He looks down instead of looking up on God. This is also what happens to us when we lose focus of life and of Jesus and give more focus on our problems and difficulties.
     Don’t look down; look up to God and to life. Don’t look at storms of problems and difficulties but let your focus be on what give life and on Jesus. Fix your eyes on life and on Jesus. Somebody said: “The natural temptation is to focus on the difficulties, on the wind and the waves, on the sense of not being in control. Fix your heart and your will on Christ. Trust in the strength and power of his saving hand. He will not let you down. If he has called you to a certain work, to a certain way of being, to a greater level of faith, he will give you the graces necessary.”
     At the time we don’t expect, in moments of distress and darkness, Jesus comes to us. He walks in our sea of doubt and fear. Nothing can stop him to care for us. Recognize him. Hear him say: “it is I.”